He is probably feeling overwhelmed by his responsibilities and this is his escape. For him to become a real Man, he will need a good infusion of a relationship with GOD. So, gradually try to get him to a real church. Not one of those Religious places, but rather a place of study and worship.How can I make my husband understand we need him home?
Update! My husband has not drink for 1 month today! He also has gone to church every sunday morning sinse! Thank God and any of you who may have prayed for us.
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Hi Jennifer, I'm sorry to hear this. I can see that it is disappointing for you.
There may be some communication problems in your marriage, I'm sorry to say. This can be shock to consider but please hear me out. Also, your husband may have some problems with alchohol. There could be many reasons why your husband is not staying home with the family.
Do you attend church? Is there a pastor or minister at church you can talk to about these issues? You may want to plan activities with church friends to cut down on the time your husband spends at the bar. Do you have other friends to do things with? Could they be a positive influence on your husband?
Overall, I think you may want to consider marriage counseling to make sure there are no communication problems in your marriage. A minister, priest or rabbi (even if you aren't Jewish) is a good, low cost way to explore ways to improve your marriage; regardless of your faith, these individuals can help you move in the right direction, because they are all going to advise you with Biblical principles.
I hate to tell you this, but you probably already know it. If your son is 5 years old and your husband is still behaving this way then he's not gonna change. You should consider leaving him.
Also...one more thing you could try first...depression DOES run in the family and if your 5 year old has trouble with it your husband may too. See if you can get him to go to the doctor and have him checked for depression. My dad used to have stress problems and anger problems and he went in and got treated and now he is a completely happy, well adjusted person. Good luck in whatever you decide to do.
My husband works 5 days a week from 4 in the morning to 7 at night and then he works on the weekend too. I have three kids and one has adhd I have always delt with it on my own. I also told my husband he needed to be home more but he is not. We now think its easier when hes at work. Your husband will not change! So either you become both mom and dad like I did or you leave him. Tell your son the truth and then let it go and do your normal day to day stuff.
maybe you should all see a therapist together (and i'm not being sarcastic). He obviously has a problem, and it's effecting you and your son. Maybe if you can sit them all down and listen to unbiased opinions, your husband can get some help. Chances are, if he does quit visiting bars and spend more time at home, your sons depression and angry behavior will cease and desist as well.
Well i must empathize with you and honestly, you have to give your husband an ultimatum, he needs to understand that its the bar or his family, tell him that you understand he works hard and needs a break but his son needs him more now more than ever. Give him some time to adjust, i am sure he will come around.
Good Luck. :)
That's unfortunate. You have to find a way to convey to him the severity of the situation. It doesn't sound like it's very important to him. Of course there are two sides to every story tho, so I can't say too much
I don't think he realize how serious the situation is. You really need to talk to your husband more seriously about the issue, and that it can't go on any longer.
looks like you guys need to sit down and discuss the kids future seriously. Make a compromise, and an agreement that can't be broken.
Show up at the bar with your son and embarrass the hell out of him!!
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